How to Discover Your Strengths in 3 Easy Steps (with 10 Great Questions!)

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Many people easily reel off their flaws and faults and yet stumble when asked to list their strengths. But to be happy, to succeed, to follow your bliss and feel empowered—it’s essential you identify your strengths and talents!

We’re all busier than ever and our world seems to be speeding up. And with all this volatility and change it’s easy to feel powerless to do anything.

So one great thing to do when we’re worrying or feeling powerless, is to connect with our strengths. This helps us feel stronger and more empowered—which in turn helps reduce our fear and worry. And it also gives us something positive to focus on.

Jump straight to the 10 questions here >> (and then scroll back up for 3 Steps plus helpful tips!)

Marianne Williamson said, “We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?”

Who indeed? Imagine if everyone in the world played to their strengths in their lives: How would the world be different?

Imagine you consciously used your talents and strengths every day. How different would YOU feel?

So let’s identify your strengths! And it might just be easier than you think.

Here are 3 Steps to Identify Your Strengths

Take 20 minutes or so and sit down with your journal, a pen and piece of paper, or at your computer.
Now answer the 10 questions below.
- Simply make a list.
- Don’t worry about repeating yourself.
- In fact if a strength comes up several times that’s GREAT, it’s a strength pattern and points to a strong strength!
Finally, review your list.
- Summarise the overarching strengths and themes you notice
- If it helps, rewrite your list on a fresh piece of paper!
- “Ta-da!” Strengths done!

TIP: Get into the detail

Look for things you normally gloss over, and then drill down to SPECIFICS.

TIP: Look for the strengths hidden underneath your answers

Some of your responses to the questions may not be what you’d consider strengths.

If so simply ask, “What’s special about—or lies underneath—that?” and then keep asking that question until you identify a strength/s that lies underneath.

Some helpful examples:

Do you yearn to paint? Underneath that might be a strength of creativity or innovativeness.
Do you enjoy weeding in your garden? Underneath that might be a strength of orderliness, nurturing or determination!
Perhaps you get complimented on your smile? Underneath that might be a strength of communications, leadership, authenticity, kindness, empathy and/or relationship-building.

FINAL TIP: Make it fun

Consider doing this with a client, friend, colleague or even a group—over Zoom or in person.

Here are 10 Great Questions/Journal Prompts to Identify Your Strengths

Tell me about some of the biggest challenges in your life? How did you overcome them? Sometimes we take our experiences for granted, not realising that we use our strengths to overcome and deal with difficult times. Even better, get a friend to ask you this question and ask them to note down the strengths they observe!
What do you like about yourself? The things we like about ourselves are usually things we’re good at!
What do you enjoy doing? We usually enjoy what we’re good at!
What do you yearn to do? Yearnings suggest possible unexplored or undeveloped talents!
What are some unusual skills you have? The word ‘unusual’ forces us to think what’s different about us. Take a moment to delve deeper and identify your underlying strengths
What are you proud of in your life? Consider what strengths you use or used in this area
What are three of your greatest strengths? A sneaky question. Using the word “greatest” implies there are other strengths too – and really focuses the mind
Tell me about your first achievement. Even if it seems boring or small now as an adult – this early achievement gives pointers to innermost strengths
What would not be like it is – had you not been part of it? eg. a work or volunteer effort. What did you do and what strengths did you use to make that happen?
What do you get complimented on most? This tells you what others admire and like about you – look for the skills and strengths underneath!

Once you have a list of your strengths, consider:

What surprised you? What strengths have you been taking for granted?
What could you do differently? Where else could you use your strengths?
How specifically could you use your strengths to make life easier?

Finally, watch out for your inner critic or gremlin…

If you notice a critical voice in your mind saying something like, “Who do you think you are?” or perhaps it’s making fun of you or being judgemental, try this:

Imagine your inner critic in a SOUNDPROOF room or padded cell.

Give your critic some delicious food and water, a good book to read or game to keep them busy. (We don’t want them to suffer. This is just so you CAN’T HEAR them any more!)
If your critic escapes, as soon as you notice, put them back in there again. Then make the walls thicker and more impenetrable.
Repeat as often as necessary!

Wrap-up

Our strengths are a powerful tool to feel confident and enjoy life, our relationships and our careers more.

Knowing your strengths helps with these 3 core areas:

Connection to ourselves: Your strengths are a core piece of who you are—they help you live your life to the fullest.
Connection to others: Our deepest connections with others come when we connect from our authentic selves. And this includes knowing and using your strengths—without apology.
Connection to something bigger than ourselves. Once we know our strengths, we can use these to contribute to something bigger—giving your life meaning and purpose.

It feels really good to keep learning about ourselves (especially the positive stuff), so be courageous and use your strengths!

And remember: Change the world. Start with you!

You may also like:

Find Your Hidden Strengths and Talents (.PDF printable based on the questions in this article)
(How to) Accept Reality: A Powerful Way to Feel Better in Difficult Situations!
Character: When it Comes Down to it – Who Are You?

Image of Strong Person With Arms Up by IC Production via Shutterstock

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